Friday, August 10, 2012

With friends like these...

When we divorced, my ex-husband got to keep the house, along with all debt and equity attached to it. Unfortunately, neither of us had attorneys, so we did not know to write a very clear clause in the decree stating that he must refinance the property within a specified period of time, so that my name (and credit) was no longer attached to it. The judge was kind enough to mention this at the hearing and offer to give me time to contact him to see if he would consent to amending the petition. Wanting the legal formalities behind me and, quite honestly, trusting that he would follow through with our agreement (that he remove my name from the loan), I consented to her finalizing the divorce without making the change. Oh, how foolish I was...

Not long thereafter, he stopped making the approximately $350/mo payments. Of course, I had no way to know this, at the time. In fact, I didn't find out that he had completely stopped making the  payments until I heard rumors of the foreclosure. When I checked the court records, I was shocked to find that, not only was I listed as a co-defendant in the case, but it had been in court for several months and he had NEVER said a word to me about it. I had explained to him the legal problems that it could cause me if he didn't take care of this responsibility. Perhaps that was a mistake...

Am I saying he's doing this to hurt me? No. I don't want to think he's capable of that. My friends disagree. After all, it's difficult to formulate some other explanation for him not paying what amounts to less than he makes in ONE day at work. Honestly, combined with the pattern that has emerged with support payments (the times he "can't afford it" always coincides with him finding out that I'm in a relationship), and I see their point. Still, I hate to think that someone I spent so many good years with could do that. So, I don't let myself go there...

In any event, since I found out about the foreclosure and the fact that the house is for sale, I have been trying to spread the word in hopes of finding a buyer. Granted, I won't get any of the purchase money. However, because he didn't take my name off the mortgage, now that he is facing possible foreclosure, his legal problem has suddenly also become my legal problem. So, a couple of days ago, I found out the price on the property had been reduced, so I posted the listing on my FaceBook. A friend asked why I was selling, so I explained that it was the house that I bought with my ex, followed by that sentence that is italicized above. Apparently this makes me evil...

The next morning I got a call from my ex-husband about how I shouldn't be "posting all over FaceBook" about how he's in foreclosure, etc. First of all, my profile is private, so only my "friends" can see it. So, apparently one of them likes to cause drama. Secondly, I sincerely do not believe that I did anything wrong. Most of my friends already knew about the foreclosure. That's how I found out. Besides, it's a matter of public record. I understand that it might be a sensitive issue. I certainly don't like having a foreclosure on my credit, either. Unfortunately, it's a reality. So, I'm doing the only thing in my power to remedy the situation. Selling the house is the best solution all the way around. I didn't realize that stating, without judgement, facts that are a matter of public record was grounds to have me drawn & quartered. Clearly I was mistaken...

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